Apologies to anyone who has been looking for me on MSN or any forums, but the past ten days have not agreed with me.

Let's start off with me not having a job. I have been jobless for a while now, and surving on money earned through menial labor such as cutting grass, washing cars, anything that requires light lifting, and other such duties is not an easy feat. Sharing the rent, utilities, and grocery bills with my parents helps, but not by much. On the subject of parents, moving back in with them was an easy choice, but my good intentions of helping to keep an eye on my step mother so she doesn't slip into another bout of diabetic shock have come back to bite me square on the ass. A full size bed, night stand, decent sized television, computer desk with computer, and a stand housing my game systems and other devices being crammed into a small room does not leave much space for me. My desk chair accomodates me while on the computer, and watching TV/playing games since my mattress has begun to cave in from being sat on so much. I can sit in the living room, but the metal working plant across the street messes with my asthma, not to mention that I get the feeling that my stepmother is trying to will me back into my room. I just hate it when it feels like someone in the room wants you to leave but won't outright say it. Funny, I offer to share a place with them, and they get the living room, bathroom and dining room, we share the kitchen, the basment's used for storage, and I'm shoved into a small room with all of my shit.

Now they want to move to Illinois because my stepmother wants to be closer to her screw up grand daughter who went and got knocked up, and personally, I don't like her and do not want to see her every other damned day. I also think she got in way over her head, and may try to con us into taking care of her kid, leave it on our doorstep, or someone else's, or maybe she'll be smart for once and put it up for adoption when the fact that for the next eighteen years, she'll have virtually no life hits her. Oh, did I mention that one of the houses we've looked at has a higher rent and the bedrooms are roughly the same size? The only thing it has over our current residence is hardwood flooring and a bigger, nicer kitchen. I even searched the web for affordable houses in St. Louis, but becoming even poorer is apparently only a miniscule price to pay for being closer to the screw up grand daughter whom I hate and could care less if anything happened to her.

The only saving grace about this summer was my step sister(screw up's mom, which is hard to believe) and her boyfriend working to get stepmom's old pool running again(They live in her old house). I am a swimmer. I'm not pro material, but I enjoy it and if I ever owned an indoor pool, I'd attempt to live in it. However, moving out of state means less swim time, and that'll just lead to me being pissed now that I've already been swimming a few times. Public pools are out the question for obvious reasons, plus I'm slowly starting to hate the human race again.

I forsee myself ghosting the web, uploading videos to Youtube(I actually enjoy doing that), and if I'm not trying to will myself into a Beverly Hills mansion, or a nice place in one of New York's good neighborhoods, or just don't feel like doing anything, I may show up on MSN or a forum or two.